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It's The (Verbal) Sucker Punches That Hurt The Most

There is a lot that hurts about being married to an alcoholic.

A.

Lot.

But perhaps some of the most painful, destructive, toxic behavior is the sucker punches. You know, the yelling, the cursing, the storming and stomping about, the spewing of unexpected, pointless, needless vicious vitriol that seems to come out of no where.

My husband and daughter have this frustrating habit of never throwing away the wrappers of stuff they open. Food products. Amazon purchases. Letters. Bath soap. You name it. If it has a wrapper and they open it, the wrapper will be dropped wherever they are standing.

Drives me crazy though not in that alcoholic-husband crazy way.

Just that "this is living with other people" crazy way.

Tonight I picked up the empty package from some pistachio nuts my husband ate. I say, honestly in just a laughing, sing song way,

"Our daughter got this gene from you."

"What gene?" His voice already escalating so it was really my "fault" for replying.

"The 'leave wrappers on the counter' gene."

"I DON"T LEAVE WRAPPERS ON THE COUNTER!"

"Why are you yelling?"

"BECAUSE YOU ACCUSE ME OF SHIT I DON'T DO AND IT PISSES ME OFF!"

No other words really.

This marriage guts me.


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I have been married to my alcoholic husband for over 20 years now. (So hard to believe and comprehend where that time went.) I have felt SO MANY things in these years of marriage. Disbelief. Rage.

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