THE NEGATIVE REVIEWS

Creative people are rather vulnerable beings when it comes to their craft of choice. Be it actors, dancers, artists, writers - when you are a creative and put your work out to the world, it can take awhile to harden yourself to the stink of negativism.

Ironically, I have come to realize the most difficult reviews or critiques to handle are those that totally miss the point of your work or message. They are also the most dangerous because they can worm their way into your psyche and trick you into believing you need to change or amend, defend or even soften your work.

There are reviews for my books on Amazon that completely miss my purpose in writing. I'm not a woman who believes you can "love the alcoholic: hate the disease." I think the idea of "detach with love" is, frankly, bonkers. Love IS attachment. And I also think, sooner or later, eventually the inevitable is a woman either leaves her alcoholic husband or it destroys her and steals her life.

Now, if there is a woman (women?) who has carved out her own authentic life amidst the rubble of the alcoholic marriage; if there is a woman (women?) who has found her way to live authentically despite the toxicity of an alcoholic husband - GREAT! I think that is fantastic and amazing and this woman (women?) should write books, blog, shout it from the rooftops! We need all the weapons in our arsenals we can gather.

But that's not my message and experience and that's ok, I've finally toughened up my tender writer's soul to be able to accept the negative without being affected by it.

Whatever dream you have, pursuit you want to pursue, don't believe the naysayers or the negatives. You don't need to adjust your dreams, just toughen your skin a little. If and when you start living from your most authentic self, you WILL annoy, piss off and alienate people, often those closest to you and especially those who are engaged in any sort of toxic relationship with you. The truth is, when you are living truest to yourself, someone will be pissed off. Someone will misunderstand you. Someone will find fault with you.

Consider it confirmation that you're on the right track to living the authentic, genuine life that is true to who you came to be.