I am in the processing of editing my book, "Leaving 101: How To Prepare To Leave Your Alcoholic Hus band - Even If You're Not Ready To Leave Your Alcoholic Husband." Last year, I edited and published a second edition of my first book, "The Alcoholic Husband Primer: Survival Lessons For The Alcoholic's Wife."
What a lesson in humility!
The first editions of both books are downright embarrassing. They are amateurish, littered with typos and formatting errors and the idea of type setting? Never ever thought of it. These were the first books I had ever published, never mind self publishing and I had a lot (A LOT!) to learn. Like don't have the friend of a friend do the formatting for you. Still, as I wince and grimace my way through the editing process, I am so glad I published these when I did. They are certainly far from perfect and would hardly be considered "professional."
Whether it is life with an alcoholic husband, staggering debt, the desire for a degree (where you can only afford one class a semester), overweight, etc., etc. we become tragically paralyzed by what we perceive as years of work while losing sight of the power in our days. I remember many (many!) years ago, I looked into becoming a "Waldorf" teacher. The Waldorf educational model is a specific learning methodology created by Rudolf Steiner in 1919. And like many "alternative" school models, what started out humble - in this case as a school for the children of factory workers - has morphed into a rather expensive alternative educational choice for parents. In my area, a Waldorf education will cost a parent about $25,000 a year. (Per kid.) I had looked into the Waldorf school and learned that as a teacher, your children could attend tuition-free.
The problem was at the time my children were already in elementary school. Working the Waldorf program would have taken me at least four years as a part-time student. "Too late," I told myself for my children to benefit from any Waldorf employment I might find. Of course, that notion was erroneous. Besides the obvious - my children may have chosen to switch schools and education model despite being in middle school - the real tragedy is I'd have that certification now. Even if it had been "too late" for my children, it wouldn't have been "too late" for me and my life.
Whatever it is you want to do.
Whatever it is you dream of for your life.
Whoever you want to be.
Toward those dreams, goals and aspirations.
As embarrassing as my first books are - and for a writer they are quite embarrassing - I'm glad I published them. I'm glad they got out there because it tends to be easier to keep going than it is to get started.
Beginnings are awkward and hard.
You may leave behind little bits of evidence - like nationally published books - attesting to that difficulty and awkwardness but never let that deter you.
Newton said it best.
A body in motion tends to stay in motion.
Get in motion.
No matter how slow it may seem at first. (You'll pick up speed.)
No matter how long you may think it will take. (It won't take nearly as long once you get started as if you never start at all.)
Life is happening now.
You can be either a participant.
Or an observer.
It's your choice but remember:
Time is like a train.
It's heading out.
Whether you're on it or not.
(Get on the train.)